It’s officially ‘back to school’ time. Five-Star commercials are running like wild fire and kids are pushing passed me in the supermarket for notebooks. I don’t care what gadgets these new fangled kids are getting, us 80s babies got the best and brightest hook ups of them all. I will never forget my mother getting a swarm of Chucky Cheese pencils, only for me to give out each and every one of them before the week was out. By Friday, I was known as the Indian giver because I had to ask for them back. (Sidebar: Why is that called “Indian giver?” I don’t believe Indians gave things and then asked for them back!?! Please let me know!)
Anyway – as Jay-Z says, “You can pay for school but you can’t buy class” and he’s absolutely right. We all know that common sense is the most valuable smarts of them all, but it’s funny how we just don’t wanna pay attention.
Recently, a friend of mine came to me about a dating question. She wanted to know if the person she was digging really likes her, based on a few scenarios presented. I don’t like commenting on people’s situations because Lawd knows I have gotten plenty of sound advice and have not taken it until going through the fire myself. I carefully broke down some of the reasons why I felt the person was not all that interested, most specifically he wasn’t showing initiative. She continued to say, “But he hits me up…but he talks to me for X amount of time.” NO, NO my sister. Not the same thing. Anyone can talk, but who is backing it up!?! Look, don’t listen! PLEASE…I’m telling you…Check yourself before you wreck yourself and wind up swimming in the pool of lovelike by yo’self!!!
As I sat and reflected on my own experiences, I just thought about all the stupid moves I have made, thinking that someone would like me more if I “worked” harder for their attention. What kind of assanine thought is that?!?! That sounds so ridiculous, but that’s really how I was maneuvering. Maybe if I show up…maybe if I just talk about what I want…aww, it doesn’t hurt to reach out first…again…again…and again. It doesn’t hurt them cause they don’t care but it most certainly puts a damper on your parade if you’re hoping and wishing for something that’s not there.
But it’s ok, we all put ourselves through emotional agony. And what’s funny, we know it all along. If we listen closely to our inner voice, we’ll breathe and remain calm for a few more moments so we can catch ourselves…but usually, we’re so hung up those thoughts of tranquility don’t seep through in the least.
It’s so interesting how much thought and weight we put on things that don’t feel great. If it doesn’t feel good, if we’re not laughing, loving, and learning, just cut it off. End of story! Don’t even waste your time. Our time is too precious and too valuable to just waste on contemplation. (This is really easy to say now that I’m not crying my eyes out. LOL But I think I’ve finally gotten it. Maybe.)
Now if someone IS showing you interest and you are interested back, please just have fun with them and learn what it feels like to be appreciated. I’m not really sure how or why we got tricked into just letting our mind jump down the aisle, but let’s dial it back and just enjoy our present.
What a difference 5 years makes when it comes to life lessons and just age old personal experience. Goodness gracious great northern beans…LOL.
Ok, that’s it for me for now!! Let’s use our common sense. If it doesn’t fit, we must acquit! Size 7 shoes on Size 9 feet never fit, no matter how hard you squeeze. Try another shoe on or get crazy corns and an irritated heel. HA. Gotta get back to writing.
Love,
Kris
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Been way too long, my former resident advisor! You have some great stuff here. I just started a blog myself, She Works Hard for the Money. You should check it out if you have the chance. Wishing you the best...
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